Dark dark sky

The night is peaceful. The most peaceful night I have ever seen before. Even the stars are more silent than they used to be. Little by little, small and elegant snowflakes are falling on the dirty ground. The nature is sleeping. But I can not sleep. This time of the year I used to wake up without any reason and listen to the sounds of the house. It may take just a moment. But I like to listen to that sounds. Every dust has got it's own sound. I am listening to the sound of the walls. It has got so much to tell! Suddenly I open my curtains,. I look into the dark sky. Sky is dark dark blue. The stars are so silent, it looks like they do not want to disturb our sleep. To disturb the magic silence of the night. I am looking to the sky and thinking: what if somewhere far far away, someone is looking at the same sky with the same minds as I do? What if that person likes to listen to the sounds of the house and likes to think about the things? What if there is a person who wakes up at night, because he has no time to think about the things during the day? And maybe that person is glad too, because he knows that somewhere far far away, there is one person who is looking at the same dark sky, at the same bright stars and is listening to the sounds of the house.

The missing feeling

How often can you miss someone? How times per day do you miss the person? Why the people who you miss the most are used to miss you the least? Did you ever felt the "miss" feeling? When you want to see the person, the feeling when you want to climb on the ceilings from the pain. That feeling when you know that there is no opportunity to see that person. Personally, I miss people a lot. There are two types of  "miss" feeling. First is when you miss the person very very much and you feel just terrible, it is when you do not want to eat, when you do not want to do anything, when you are waiting for somebody, but nobody comes- that's just terrible! Second type is when you miss the person, but you miss in a good way. When you can miss the person with the memories about that person- it is a pleasant "miss" feeling. That feeling gives you a hope that you will meet someday with that person, but till that time you have to wait a bit. Even though, you know that one or two months is not a bit if you are feeling the first type of "miss" feeling, but for the second type of this feeling it is just a moment. Per month or two months, you will not got colder, even though it would be a cold cold winter, because people who have memories, well, they never feel coldness. Also the people who are used to miss people in the second type of this feeling. They never feel alone. They never feel coldness. I feel cold. I used to feel the first type of this feeling. I miss almost all people with that sad form of missing. People are saying: 'What you can not change, it is not necessary to be sad about.' Yes, it is not necessary to be sad about. It is better do not think of anything...

I am just fine

I am just fine. Just my lungs do not want to breathe anymore. Just my heart do not want to beat anymore... Just my soul is lost somehwere. My soul is lost and I do not know where I could find it. My brains do not want to think. My brains do not want to create minds anymore... I am okey. I am healthy. I am happy. Am I happy? Do not know. I am sure about that. My lungs, heart, soul, brains do not want to functionate... But personally, I want to live. I want to live with my eyes, because my eyes want to see everything: every colour, every letter, every smile- everything. I want to live, because my ears do want to listen all the birds, all the butterflies wings, all the morning greetings- everything. My legs want to walk, to jump, to run- to do everything. I still want to scream from the happiness when I see person, who I like. I would like to say something nice to my enemies. I am fine. Just as I said, my soul is lost somewhere. Or maybe, it's just hiding somewhere?